So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
You should frame my arrest warrant.
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
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