And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize
