I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
I'm currently watching porn and playing beer pong with wine in the lobby of a hotel with a squadron of hot airforce guys. You can never say your life is better than mine again
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
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