It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
God gave him joint rollers for hands
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
Randomize
