yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
Randomize
