I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
Randomize
