so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
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