Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
highlight of my day: hitchhiking a ride with random locals. tried to make conversation, asked what they do. driver says "you clearly don't recognize me." turns out i have had sex with him and forgot.
You are officially qualified to graduate from college.
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Randomize
