I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
Dental hygienist just pulled two flakes of glitter out. And asked me how i've been doing with the divorce.
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
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