so that wasnt chicken after all
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
Randomize
