no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
I want her autograph on my taint
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
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