she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
One of my friends took me out last night for a bday celebration and I just now remembered that a man blew fire balls across the bar in honor of my birthday... How drunk do you have to be to forget that?
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
Randomize
