I wish I could punch you in the face.
Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
i don't like sucking hair
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
Randomize
