we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
a search helicopter?!
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
I think I just sharted jello shots
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