Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
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