when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
Princesses don't give blow jobs
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize
