Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
Harpoon that
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
Randomize
