I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
Randomize
