I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
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