You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
Randomize
