im at the bar and i misjudged a fart...go home or ride the night out?Never mind, the bouncer made the decision for me...be home soon
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
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