Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
You're going to literally shit your fucking unholy pants when Jesus rides in with his dual light-sabers on his velociraptor and cleaves you in half.
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
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