Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
How can I explain how nice he is to you? ...like, I'm going to have to have my world famous why being a douche is sexy talk.
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
Randomize
