Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
Just remembered throwing your phone at your face in a half-drunk stupor the other morning when your alarm went off. Thought I should apologize.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
Randomize