Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
