So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
Randomize
