: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
Randomize
