if you like me you must not know who I am
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
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