do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
Randomize
