It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
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