you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
Randomize
