She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
