But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Randomize
