its not stalking. its research.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
Apparently karate chopping the fronts off all the paper towel and soap dispensers in the bathrooms isn't even frowned upon. Like even at the third bar when I fell flat on my back trying to jump kick the last one some guy just helped me up and high fived me. America.
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
Randomize
