i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
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