just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
Randomize