i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
Randomize
