not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
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