please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Randomize
