Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
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