I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
Randomize
