fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
Just cropdusted the office
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
You attempted what you called the "Long Island Heist", in which you shoved a half glass of Long Island down your pants and asked me to help you sneak it out. That drunk.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
Randomize
