im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
The air taste purple.
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
Randomize
