IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
I'm bleeding and have questions
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
Finally got with the virgin.
Yeah? Howd that go?
As soon as I got it all the way in, I looked deep into her eyes and said "your soul is mine" in the deepest voice I could make. She was not amused.
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Randomize
