I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
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