I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
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