The brown eye won't let me do that either.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Randomize
