I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
Randomize
