either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
Drunk me really needs to stop 1. telling every attractive dude in a relationship that monogamy isn't real 2. Proposing threesomes with them and their girlfriends
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
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