I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
Thanks for feeding me more tequila shots to prevent me from trying to fight her last night. Horrible logic? Yes, but you are the best friend ever
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
At least I’m an “essential employee” and can still bang my boss. \n\nFingers crossed my husband doesn’t ask why I’m essential, the orgasms are too good to give up during this pandemic
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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